Dealing with Anxiety & Nervousness in Young Players – How to Support Children Who Struggle with Confidence

Dealing with Anxiety & Nervousness in Young Players – How to Support Children Who Struggle with Confidence

Every coach and parent has seen it before—a child who is clearly talented but struggles with nerves and self-doubt. Whether it’s a footballer who freezes before a match, a cricketer who panics when facing a fast bowler, or a netball player too anxious to ask for the ball, anxiety can hold young athletes back from reaching their full potential.

At AU Sports, we believe that helping children manage nerves and build confidence is just as important as teaching them technical skills. In this blog, we’ll explore why kids feel anxious in sport, how to support them, and practical strategies to help them perform with confidence.

1️⃣ Why Do Young Athletes Feel Anxious?

Nervousness in sport is completely normal. Even professional athletes feel it before a big game! But for young players, anxiety can come from several sources:

🔹 Fear of Failure – Worrying about making mistakes or letting the team down.

🔹 Pressure from Parents & Coaches – Feeling like they must meet high expectations.

🔹 Comparing Themselves to Others – Seeing others perform better and feeling inadequate.

🔹 Overthinking Performance – Focusing too much on doing everything perfectly.

🔹 Bad Past Experiences – A poor game, a missed penalty, or harsh criticism in the past.

📌 Example: A child who once missed an easy goal might now hesitate every time they get a scoring opportunity, scared of repeating the mistake.

2️⃣ Signs of Anxiety in Young Athletes

🚨 Avoids eye contact or seems withdrawn in training.

🚨 Makes excuses to miss games or training sessions.

🚨 Plays too cautiously—avoiding taking risks.

🚨 Overthinks simple actions, hesitating before making a pass or shot.

🚨 Shows frustration or gives up quickly after mistakes.

🚨 Complains of stomach aches or feeling unwell before games.

📌 Tip: Some kids may not say they feel nervous, but their body language and behaviour often reveal it.

3️⃣ How Coaches & Parents Can Help

✅ 1. Reframe Mistakes as Learning Opportunities

Instead of saying “Don’t worry about that mistake,” say “Great effort! What did you learn from that?”.

Encourage kids to see mistakes as a natural part of improvement. The best players in the world make mistakes every game.

📌 Example: A cricketer gets bowled out early—ask them, “What could you do differently next time?” rather than “Why didn’t you play that properly?”

✅ 2. Focus on Effort, Not Outcome

Winning is great, but growth and enjoyment matter more.

🔹 Praise effort, attitude, and improvement rather than just results.

🔹 Avoid saying “You’re so talented”—instead, say “You worked really hard today.”

🔹 Make training about learning and fun, not just performance.

📌 Example: A netballer who misses a shot shouldn’t hear “You should have scored that.” Instead, say “Great movement to get into position! Keep practising that shot.”

✅ 3. Keep Instructions Simple & Clear

Too many instructions can overwhelm young players.

❌ Don’t say: “Keep your body position low, eyes up, weight forward, and make sure you don’t rush.”

✅ Do say: “Stay relaxed, focus on the ball, and enjoy yourself.”

📌 Tip: Less is more. One or two key instructions help more than a long list of corrections.

✅ 4. Create a Safe Environment for Mistakes

Children need to feel safe to try things without fear of criticism.

✅ Encourage trying new things, even if they don’t work every time.

✅ Avoid negative body language (e.g., sighing, shaking your head).

✅ Use positive reinforcement: “I love how you went for that pass!”

📌 Example: If a footballer tries a new skill and loses the ball, praise the bravery, not the outcome: “Great idea! Keep working on it.”

✅ 5. Teach Relaxation Techniques

Simple strategies can help kids stay calm before and during games:

🌿 Deep Breathing – “Breathe in for 4 seconds, hold for 4, breathe out for 4.”

🌿 Positive Self-Talk – Replace “I’m not good enough” with “I can do this.”

🌿 Focus on Fun – Remind them why they love playing.

📌 Example: If a cricketer is nervous before bowling, have them take a deep breath, focus on their routine, and trust their practice.

✅ 6. Set Achievable Goals

Instead of “Score 3 goals today,” set process-based goals like:

✅ Take 5 shots on goal.

✅ Call for the ball at least 3 times.

✅ Try a new skill at least once in the game.

📌 Example: If a nervous basketball player is scared to shoot, encourage them to focus on getting into good positions, rather than worrying about scoring.

✅ 7. Model Confident Behaviour

Children copy what they see. If a coach or parent stays calm and positive, kids will too.

🚀 Keep body language open and encouraging.

🚀 Avoid shouting in frustration—stay composed.

🚀 Smile, laugh, and make sport fun!

📌 Tip: If you stay relaxed and show that mistakes are okay, kids will feel more confident too.

4️⃣ Long-Term Benefits of Managing Anxiety

Helping young athletes overcome nerves now will benefit them far beyond sport:

🎯 More enjoyment & longer participation – They’ll stick with sport for years.

🎯 Better resilience in everyday life – Learning to handle pressure helps at school & beyond.

🎯 Stronger self-belief – Kids who build confidence in sport apply it to other challenges.

🎯 Improved performance – A relaxed, confident player always plays better than a tense one.

📌 Example: A child who learns to stay calm under pressure in sport will be better at handling school tests, public speaking, and life’s challenges in general.

Final Thoughts: Confidence is a Skill That Can Be Taught

Every child has the ability to build confidence in sport. They just need the right support, encouragement, and tools to manage nerves.

🎯 Key Takeaways for Coaches & Parents:

✅ Praise effort, not just results.

✅ Keep instructions simple and avoid overloading kids.

✅ Make training a safe space for mistakes.

✅ Teach relaxation techniques to help with nerves.

✅ Set realistic, process-based goals.

🚀 The best way to build confidence in young athletes is to create an environment where they feel safe, supported, and excited to play!

👇 What strategies do you use to help nervous young players? Let us know in the comments!